Out of Sorts … Out of Words

I have been out of sorts this week and out of words. I have been busy with lots of medical appointments and had to have a blood transfusion which left me very tired. But all is going according to plan according to my oncologist and for that I am very grateful. I have been in the type of mood where I have just wanted to be left alone this week. I have not even read some of my usual blogs and been on the web very much, however I have spent plenty of time reflecting on where I need to go and how I will get there. I know this all sounds like I am very self absorbed but I feel I needed the time to think. I have also enjoyed the week, I managed to do some writing, some walking and some reading. I have missed my blog and the net but last week I just felt I needed a rest from it. Now I am back…. oh nobody’s listening….

Bad Blogger Again

I have been a bad blogger again. I have been a bit out of sorts over the weekend I have been in the sort of mood were I just want to be left alone. As soon as I find myself again I will post.

Blogger fined for ‘menacing’ rant

I found this story via the BBC website and I wondered did anyone have any thoughts on it?

Blogger fined for “menacing rant”

Hotel on fire … Ireland is at peace

After the drama of a fire alarm The Taoiseach when to address the joint Houses of Congress. After what was an awful introduction by the House Speaker.  In short, he asked for the undocumented Irish in America to be legalised,  he remembered the fire fighters form the New York ladders who were lost on 9/11 and he declared that Ireland is at peace. I wonder is it at peace with itself ??

Letter from America

Regular readers to this blog (what a joke) will remember my mentioning two friends of mine who live and work in the USA. Both of them have reason to interact with the American prison system. One as a Jesuit priest based in Louisanna and the other as a lawyer in New York. I am in e-mail contact with both and I enjoy their e-mails of life in the deep south and life in the big city. My friend who is a Jesuit recently told me that he visited a prisoner in the state prison at Angola, a 24 year old black man who is serving life without the possibility of parole. He has been in prison since he was 19 years of age. He asked to see a priest because he wanted someone to visit his Mother. His Mother lives on the other side of the state, she is a single woman with 3 more children living in a project apartment. Another son is serving 12 - 25 years in another state prison he is 18. This lady can barley read or write she works 3 cleaning jobs and still needs welfare and food stamps to survive. Her son went into Angola barely able to read or write. He is now studying for a degree after getting his high school diploma and reads anything he can get his hands on. He wanted the priest to pass on the message to his Mother that he is OK and he knows she does not have any money to send to him for canteen (prison shop). He also wanted his younger brothers to know that prison is not cool or easy it is lonely, cruel and he wants them to stay out of it. With 1 in 100 Americans in prison and the prisons of the deep south packed with young black men his message is a wise one. I am making no excuses for people in America’s prisons. But I will say this I think locking poor black kids up at the age of 17 or 19 with no possibility of parole is not the way to go. I wonder what the Senators for Arizona New York or Illinois have to say about America’s over flowing jails and prisons. No votes to be won from behind the walls so I don’t think they will change the regime do you?

Bathroom Blues

Today was full of great promise, it was another nice day weather wise here by the sea. I woke with the intention of completing at least half of my post it note list this morning. At this early point I must inform you of my love of Post It Notes and lists. It is very rare if I do not have some kind of little yellow list on my desk. Anyway back to this morning, my whole internet connection was still playing silly games which made most of my list undone this morning. How much do we rely on this internet business?? Lots. So I decided to go outside and have a little read in the sun which was nice. However I was not feeling at my best. This afternoon I had to go for physiotherapy on my shoulder.  On the way there (and there is no nice way of putting it) I got a horrible pain in my stomach and by the time I got home lets just say I needed to stay as close as possible to the bathroom. Luckily we have more than one bathroom because I am practically camped out in one of them.

As for the physiotherapy it was sore but I can feel the benefits of it. After the skin graft my brain seemed to tell my left arm to stay as still as it can. I now look like the Dalai Lama with John McCain’s left arm. (Picture that… no ok) I suspect my shoulder would like a divorce but it’s stuck with me. Right now the way I am feeling I would like a divorce from my bathroom…

PC Live

I picked up April’s copy of PC Live yesterday. I know you all probably know all this but in it and I was delighted to see Grandad talking tech and family values on page 10. He also manages to mention Grannymar, K8 the GR8 and Twenty. He also reminds us that Damien has his finger on the pulse even thought he lives in that far off land of Cork. Grandad also pops up again on page 38 and it was great to see, even if I am late seeing it.

Run for your life…

I have being having major problems with my net connection which has stressed me out no ends. I had the posts all ready to go and then boom - no connection. So the weekend was pretty good it involved some sleep, food out which was nice. It also involved a walk along the beach at Skerries, the route I took is one of my favourite walks along the coast. When I was on the first Cancer battle I had 8 eight weeks between coming out of hospital and doing my leaving cert. I used to run this route every morning in an effort to get fit. It never failed to lift my mood, the sea, the endless view beyond what the eye can see and of course the feeling of freedom. Even when I lived in London and I ran in Alexander Palace which had wonderful views over North London it was nothing compared to the view at home. Silly I know but true. I hope that this recovery will get to the stage that I can run this route again.

Friday’s post on Saturday…

I wrote these post’s long hand on Friday but due to sleep, visits and just being lazy I am only posting them today:

Well I managed to get home in one piece yesterday (Thursday) I did have a little motion sickness. But I did enjoy the fresh air before the rain came. It was nice to be drip free. I look like the Dalia Lama at the moment, his problem is China, mine not being quite as big - a complete recovery. It was nice to sleep in a double bed without a light shinning somewhere. The whole process of finding a routine which allows me to meet all my medical appointments, finding a way to get fit and doing useful things with my life is something which i need to figure out. I do have a tendency to jump into things straight away when I come out of Hospital. I need to resist the temptation to do too much too soon. I will take the next week or so to see how it will all pan out. I have just realised this must be the most boring post ever to read. Me droning on about what I am going to do over the next few weeks. Anyway we shall see how it goes. I am sure that between medical appointments, blood tests and all the rest I will find the time for the odd game of Mario Kart. 

 

It has been a nice day. No injections which was nice. I have returned my desk to the way I like it and managed to set up alarms to take my meds. I know you may think that this is a bit over the tip but I have quite a few to take. I enjoyed my lunch which we went out for and I even managed to buy a new pair of trainers (nice Puma ones). By the time I got back from lunch I was very tired. The whole afternoon pretty much went on sleep. It really does take some adjusting to the idea that you can wander outside and take in the air. Right now my favorite thing is fresh air, just the fact that I can go outside pleases me no end. 

Last Post

Tonight is my last night in hospital for awhile anyway and quite frankly I am more than happy to have it that way. I am fully aware that this battle is far from over. I have to get back to a level of fitness that means I can for example climb a stairs without being breathless. I have of course to give blood weekly for the next few weeks and do lots of sleeping. I am looking forward to normality, doing normal things and though complete normality is awhile off I can see it in the near future. I have written the rest of the year off in effect but if I get back to some kind of normal level of fitness and mental fitness in the next couple of months I will see it as a major plus. My plans do very much include not forgetting others who are fighting cancer. I am not sure what form this will take as yet but I am sure I will come up with something. I will of course be thanking the Doctors, Nurses and other staff who cared for me so well. I would also like to the Revenue Commissioners or at least a small section of them for the e-mails, the support and the football chat. Thanks guys all of you.